Tom Phipps Presents: Tontons Macoute Come to Gallup


Tom Phipps Presents:

Tontons Macoute
Come to


Pierre Jon LeTrec was the dictator of an island in the West Indies which was once the property of France. Unfortunately no one cared for Monsieur LeTrec, for they resented being murdered in their sleep by his Tontons Macoute. When he disliked someone’s politics, he would send his Tontons around at midnight to haul the unfortunate soul out into the street in front of his horrified family and shoot him in the head. At last, the citizens rose up in an armed coup de tete and drove him from the island.

Meanwhile the people of Gallup were peacefully going about their business. 63% of them CH04_090m_sheknitteditformehad jet black hair. 22% of them had dark brown hair. 7% had light mousy-brown hair. 5% were blond and 3% had red hair (the punk rocker with the blue Mohawk doesn’t count, for he never woke up from his sleep in the drunk tank).

As fate would have it, Pierre Jon LeTrec and forty of his Tontons Macoute arrived in Gallup in their Bentley Superfast, with a trunk full of Uzis and AKs. They blocked off the roads. Nonews-graphics-2004_565903a one could come in. No one could leave. Within 48 hours, LeTrec had total control. Before he could open the road blocks, he knew he would have to win the hearts of the citizens of Gallup. To do that, he would have to blow out the brains of all who disagreed with him. He set to work at once. Every midnight he sent out his Tontons with a list of people to execute.

The most feared voodoo witch of LeTrec’s island had red hair. In fact all voodoo witches 5794819670_af6a694725_mdid. The Tontons Macoute were terrified whenever they hauled someone out under the street lights to find that they had red hair. They would gasp in horror and let the luckyRed_Hair_Model red haired person go.

The people of Gallup didn’t like LeTrec any more than the people of his island did. The people of Gallup refused to give in. After fifty years, the road blocks were still in place. What was the most common color of hair of the citizens of Gallup after fifty years?4jWiP


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